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Good to Great Who is More Important? The Student or the Mentor?
By Darren | January 27, 2010
Do you really want to go from good to great?
Do your actions prove that? Which do you think is more important, the student or the mentor?
The easy truth is both. Though correct, it would be a cop out and make for a very brief article, lacking insight. You deserve an answer.
Like you, I’ve been a mentor and student to many. We all have different depths of mentor / mentee relationships with varying levels of intensity.
No one becomes great alone.
The right mentor is crucial, because if we follow the advice of the wrong person, our efforts may be in vain. Though we actually learn more by immersing ourselves in the experience, we can save time if we follow the best advice. Great mentors teach what they learned from their experience. Reporters teach by regurgitating what they heard somewhere else.
One of my pet peeves is seeing someone teaching “how to do something” they have never done… like how to make a million dollars as a speaker, though they never have. That’s why it took me two years of YouTube experience before I felt I could create an educational program to teach other people how to do it: You Post It…You Profit.
As students, one of our scariest thoughts should be “I’ve heard him / her speak before…” or “I’ve listened to that program once, and it was great.”
Ouch! Great students don’t think that way! Are you kidding me? Even worse… thinking, “I already know that.” Unless you’re at the top of your field, though you may “know” something, you probably have not internalized it to the level of the top 1%.
When I get a chance to hear Alan Weiss talk about business, I’m there every time. When I get a chance to see Patricia Fripp coach a speaker, I’m there! Even though I may have a solid business - and I may be a good speaking coach - I learn something every time from these masters.
If we want to go from good to great, we must be clear that we can’t fully absorb great wisdom the first time we hear it. Sometimes it takes awhile. And, that’s okay.
I got an e-mail yesterday from a person who watched my free webcast last weekend. He said that he wasn’t planning to tune in because he’d seen me do that topic before… but at the last minute, he changed his mind. He told me that he got even more out of it this time. Honestly, the information was basically the same. The student was different this time.
I’ve had almost a thousand people invest in my Get Paid to Speak By Next Week® program. Some students literally get paid to speak the next week… some, the next month… and some, the next year. What’s the difference? The information is exactly the same. I believe the difference is the intensity and focus of the student. Though it is not inspiring, I love the truth behind this quote:
“We humans are an egotistical breed.
We regularly ignore specialists who could help,
and we’re expert in making cunning excuses
for our self-destructive behavior.”
~ Dr. Jeffrey Lant, Author
Here’s a perfect example… The year I was competing in the World Championship of Public Speaking, I had the opportunity to hear 1995 World Champ, Mark Brown, at our regional conference. Many of my competitors weren’t even attending the session! I was sitting in the front row, leaning in, absorbing every word that came out of his mouth. My intensity was apparent, even to Mark.
Exactly one year later, I was speaking at the same regional conference, as the reigning World Champion. Three competitors had approached me in advance for advice. One had sent an e-mail asking a couple questions. One competitor had called on the phone and asked me questions for about 20 minutes. The other one had asked me to actually visit two clubs where he was speaking, and coach him. I never heard a peep from any of the other five competitors. I was the local winner — any of them could have connected with me with just a little effort.
Guess what happened the day of the contest? The three people who approached me came in first, second, and third. Guess which order? The one who e-mailed me came in third, the one who I spoke to on the phone placed second. The man who I coached at two clubs went on to compete in the World Championship.
Though I believe my coaching helped each of them, I don’t pretend to take credit for their results. I believe their level of focus and intensity can be extrapolated to everything else they did to prepare for that contest.
I’d be willing to say that people who invested in my Get Paid to Speak® program and got paid quickly, probably have also invested in other like programs as well. I’ll bet they also went through the program with great focus and intensity.
To take good care of my speech delivery mechanism (my body) I started doing Hip Hop Abs. My first goal was to create the habit of doing it daily. Now, my next goal is to do it with intensity. I have days where I do the program, and I have days where I’m ‘into it.’ I sweat more and get more benefits when I’m a better student.
In the past I’ve said:
“Take away my struggle, you take away my growth.”
What’s the fastest way from good to great? Who is more important, the student or the teacher?
When fellow speakers gave me feedback on my contest speech, they all told me to “get up from your fall quicker.” Had I listened to that advice, I would never have won the World Championship. My mentor and coach, Mark Brown said, “When you fall, stay down longer.” He gave me the exact opposite advice of everyone else. He was a crucial part of my journey.
The wrong advice will make your journey from good to great longer. (Good news: You can still get there!). The right mentors will save you time and effort.
In my opinion, the student is more important on the journey from good to great. As the student, you choose your mentors (yes, more than one… they take many forms). And, as the student, you also decide on your own level of intensity.
With which mentors are you choosing to invest your time? As a student, what level is your intensity?
Topics: Stage Time Comments |
January 28th, 2010 at 6:58 am
Excellent article, Darren!
You really hit the nail on the head with the intensity (passion) of the student and the student’s choice of mentors and coaches as being the leading indicators of their success!
What a wonderful reminder that the responsibility lies within each of us to choose to become great!
All the Best!
Dawn
January 28th, 2010 at 9:19 am
I have read othersarticles you have written. I enjoy getting your news letters because of them. “Good to Great” really hit home because it pointed out that the responsibilty of our own careers are really in our hands and reflects how much we truly put into it.
January 28th, 2010 at 9:22 am
Hello Darren,
What great personal examples you shared.
What I love about reading all of your articles is that your genuine sincerity, to help others learn, shines through.
It reminds me of what Maya said to Oprah:
“When you get - give. When your learn, teach.” That is what you do so well.
Thank you for sharing.
Ida from Detroit
January 28th, 2010 at 12:20 pm
Darren:
I have listened to you,Craig,Ed and Patricia for years and have learned more than I ever could on my own. I continue to learn each time I listen to each of you speak, read your books, or listen to your products. When I ask others “who wants to be an exceptional presenter I get a lot of hands”. But when I ask who has put in more time than just their TM club meetings I get no responses. Most people just want Validation not Edcucation”. And when I try to pass on what Iv’e learned I am called all kinds of great names (hehind my back of course). And they wonder why they don’t get any better. See you at Lady and the Champs.